I don’t like malicious people. Those who encourage maliciousness or those who are malicious. That is the biggest change of me in the year 2014. It’s been a process… I’d like to think it all started on December 26th. One of the best days of my life ruined by an out of control Transphobic violent drunk.
I don’t like greed. Hate or those who enable hate. Those who are Transphobic and those who enable them are shit. Those who support violence or are violent. Yuck…
I could’ve easily got revenged. A younger, more immature Sansan, would’ve gone for the jugular. I could’ve done so many evil malicious things. But my journey through life has taught me it doesn’t solve anything. I lose part of my soul in the process. Let it go, they’ll get theirs. It’s not the person I am or the person I want to be. Actions speak louder than words always and forever.
I want to focus on more positive things, people who actually support me and love me. Turn a Negative into Positive. Someone told me that thinking in terms of turning a Negative into a Positive is a wrong way to think as you need a negative for a positive. But I am not sure I completely agree, you need to acknowledge negative things and be aware of it. And turning something shitty into something beautifully positive is one of the challenges of life.
Maybe it’s all worthless. We are just a cosmic accident and life is meaningless. There is no cosmic force… and maybe that is true. I don’t believe it to be true… I am mostly agnostic but fuck I choose to carry on living with a more positive outlook. Make this time on this rock a more pleasant experience for everyone I meet. Hopefully there is reincarnation. But I don’t want to live trying to get a reward for my next life, or a reward for karma, but because it’s the right thing to do. Smile at people.. love them. Give them a hug. I FUCKING LOVE HUGS.
But goodness, I know there are evil people who exist in this world. But I’d really like to meet all the good people. I’ve really put myself out there, and sometimes it has brought hate, but I am having such better experiences as well.
Those who wish to be evil… it all depends on the situation. I can’t say someone is powerless if they have a gun or something, context is important, but a lot of times (in the right situation) they only have power if you give them power. But I’d like to believe most people (not all) don’t want to be evil. Sometimes you can use hate as a teaching moment.
I am a firm believer in communication. If someone hurts you, you tell them they hurt you. It’s the only way to reach understanding of each others souls. Knowledge is power and the next step is learning and evolving. Instead of being super defensive, listen and communicate. The problem is everyone is so defensive and thinks being told their actions are hurtful is a personal attack on them.
Forgiveness is wonderful, if the other party seeks to make things right.
The worst thing you can do is be malicious back.